Battle Cry

"Then he got into the boat and his disciples followed him. Suddenly a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping. The disciples went and woke him, saying, 'Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!'

He replied, 'You of little faith, why are you so afraid?' Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm." -- Matthew 8:23-26 (NIV)

Lately, I feel like God has been asking me to trust Him completely, in all areas of my life. That's easier said than done. The disciples had Jesus with them, in the flesh, and they struggled with the concept. For me, circumstances over the years have taught me that trust often results in a broken heart. I tend to live in a realm filled with doubt and fear, especially where my heartstrings are extended or attached. I've built up thick walls around my heart in an attempt to keep out anything that may cause me pain. At times, the result has been extreme loneliness and isolation.

I think I've finally come to a place in my life that I realize that I can't afford to go on living in fear and doubt and hiding behind the towering walls that I've constructed within me anymore. When I graduated from high school, the following verse from Proverbs was on one of my graduation cards... "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." -- Proverbs 3:5,6 (NIV) At the time, it struck me as really profound. It was early on in my faith journey and I grasped onto it with all of my might. I decided that that's what I wanted my life to look like. I need to return to that hopeful, child-like place again.

You ask for my trust,

and i know that I must,

but my heart lusts after fear and

gives in to prideful restraint;

constantly shouting complaints

like rotten eggs maliciously

flicked and splattered and smeared

on the front door.

I fall on the floor

longing for more and

I cry out, "I surrender!"

to end this war.

I reach out to my King and

fall flat on my face and

rest in His grace.

AMEN!

Lord, thank you for your perfect love. Thank you that You love me, no matter what I do. Thank you for being patient with me. I pray that You strengthen my heart and heal all of the bruises and scars that have formed on this bumpy road called life. Help me to walk in trust and truth. AMEN!

photo, prose and poem © 2011 by DKF